My dearest Shosh and Jaialai:
Beware of hypocrites, my sons. They are abound and they often assume leadership roles after donning the mantle of virtues to cover up their vices. A cursory search of the Internet and you’ll find lots of stories about “leaders” who publicly extol the virtues of family values while bedding prostitutes or otherwise cheating on their spouses, who publicly decry the harms of homosexuality while engaging in homosexual conducts behind closed doors and in dark corners, etc.
For example, there is an elderly woman who goes to church 3-4 times a day, befriends mostly priests and nuns and other members of religious orders, constantly talks about her charitable work helping the poor and the disenfranchised, and loves visiting the Holy Land and the Holy See. From all appearances, one would think her place in heaven is assured. However, her conducts do not always conform with her words. More often than not, she “helps” the poor while helping herself. She uses the poor and the cripple to raise funds, a sizeable portion of which goes to support her lavish and jet-set lifestyle.
At least she is small fry and those she professed to help actually do receive help, albeit not as much as they would have had to minimized her expenditures and maximized benefits to those she promised to help. There are scammers out there who steal millions from the poor and the dying, all while basking in the lie that they’re there to help the poor and the dying. https://www.cnn.com/2013/06/13/us/worst-charities/index.html.
Much has been said in the news recently about the egregious conducts of Oxfam “leaders”, but I am not surprised. The adage that people kiss up and shit down comes to mind. While there are lots of good people out there who work hard to help the poor, the homeless, the elderly, and the disenfranchised, too often the dishonorable infiltrates their ranks and besmirch their good names by claiming to help those less fortunate but, in actuality, abusing the latter.
Years ago, while working at a refugee camp to provide free legals services to asylum seekers, I came across a little toad of Vietnamese man from Australia who claimed to volunteer overseas “to help” his people. In truth, he was there to prey on the weak and helpless and to coerce one into becoming his bride. Shortly after arrival, reportedly he pointed to the most beautiful young Vietnamese woman helping out in the office and announced that he’d marry her. True to his words, shortly thereafter, he married her and quit his voluntary position. (Asylum seekers in those days could spend years languishing in refugee camps and often look for marriages as the way out. Often, the women would even offer to pay men to marry them. Of course, this constitutes marriage fraud, is highly unethical, and is illegal. Love can flourish even in the most dire of circumstances, but these sham marriages are often unbalanced relationships between those with power — the man with an overseas passport (often a loser who has been rejected by his female compatriots at home) — and those without — the powerless woman who has given up everything she’s known to face an uncertain future while languishing in a refugee camp. There is nothing fair or virtuous about these sham marriages.)
At the same time, I met another winner who repeatedly tried and failed to gain admission to law school then who went about bragging how he intends to get “an MBA in history.” Another winner. Unfortunately, they were not alone.
The trick is to watch what people do, and not put too much faith in what they say. If their conducts conform with their words, then believe them. If not, then stay clear of them.
A man is only as good as his word. If a person has no honor and use his or her words only to further his or her deceptions, then be wary of him or her. It is only a matter of time before you, too, fall prey to his or her lies.
We are raised in honest households; thus, we are no match for those who spend their hours and minutes scheming to defraud others. Thus, it is best to give such ilk wide berth.
Likewise, do not do anything that would cause you to fall among the ranks of the hypocrites and liars. Be you. Be the best you possible. Live right. It will not always be easy, but it will always be right. And, who promised you that life would be easy? It isn’t. Regardless, you can still live well, my sons, and leave the world a better place than when you found.
I love you with all my heart,